The place I showed up in America was Kentucky, of all places. At that point I could not have told you the cultural differences between Kentucky and California. Within a year I was up to speed. Experiencing racist demonization can do that to you.
In Kentucky I found massive consternation about the idea of arranged marriages. There were people who thought it was flat out wrong. There were those who accepted it as a cultural difference. The idea made me uncomfortable even before I came to America, but it did not take me long to realize marriages in America are not that not arranged either. Like Time magazine once said, you might fall in love with the stranger you spotted across the room, but it is society that decides what room you were in. That part was fixed. It was arranged. Only a narrow band of people cross the racial, cultural lines in matters of romance. That is not in the individual domain, that is in the collective domain.
That is not a defense of arranged marriages. I hope the practice fades away over time. More and more people pick their own mates. And I hope interracial marriages end up the norm not the exception in America.
And so you have this free speech debate in India. Like Fred Wilson would say, I am a free speech bigot. Some people in power in India are saying free speech is okay as long as you don't disrespect Sonia Gandhi. I don't buy that. But I do happen to respect Sonia Gandhi.
I have been struggling to work on a few autobiographical blog posts. I have wondered if I should publish them at this blog, my most active blog, or maybe they belong at my other blogs. The buspark post belongs at my Nepal blog, and the Kentucky post belongs at my Barackface blog.
They are going to be angry posts. I don't intend to mince words.
I have put out some posts at my blogs that people have described as "hilarious" and "hysterical." Well, these posts will not fall into those categories. They will fall into the angry category. They will fall in the nonviolent militancy category. I have been toying with the idea for about two weeks now. Longer perhaps. But for about two weeks in a more concrete way. It has been hard to get down to it.
If it is hard to talk about now, how much harder must have it been to go through them when they happened? Long time. Long time coming.
Image via WikipediaIf in a city that is 60% nonwhite, when you enter a room and almost everyone is white, and you are nonwhite, of course you notice. But then the term nonwhite does not define me. I am not non anything. The very term nonwhite is Eurocentric.
Topology: Wikipedia a major area of mathematics concerned with properties that are preserved under continuous deformations of objects, such as deformations that involve stretching, but no tearing or gluing. It emerged through the development of concepts from geometry and set theory, such as space, dimension, and transformation.
Ever since I was 10 I have mostly found myself in rooms where seeking cultural overlap was not exactly an option. Part of that is liberating. You enter into topology territory fast. The essence of what makes you human is not defined by if you have a limb or not. Cultural differences are a small matter compared to someone who might have missing legs.
I showed up in Kentucky. For a few weeks I did not understand people. People did not understand me. I would ask questions in class. The professors would make me repeat a few times and give up. I spoke fast.
I am a Third World Guy. That is not my past. That is my daily reality. That has implications.
Two white guys destroyed my high school experience. One white guy destroyed my college experience. Some white guys tried to destroy my New York City experience.
I left you an entire country. I left you a state, an entire region. There is nowhere to go after New York. In New York you have my back against the wall. You don't want to corner a cat. That is a bad idea. I feel an enormous itch to create, to fight.
They built a white-Pahadi coalition against me in Kathmandu. They built a white-black coalition against me in Kentucky. They tried to build a white-black coalition against me in New York City.
Charlie Rangel thinks he is going to live for 10 more years. I wish every of those years upon him. I want the motherfucker to watch.
Black is a beautiful color. I wear black. A certain shade of black, with a little shine on it.
Used to be sky blue, now it is black. I like black. It is an amazing color. It has depth.
I showed up in Kentucky with a tailor made suit from back home: brown.
But right now it is black. I like the color.
It also is about simplicity.
I have a few different black Brazil shirts that I wear at home on a few different days. Pele was God when I was growing up. He still is. Brazil is Mecca.
I wear black to express solidarity with my president Barack Obama. I wear black for him too. You have no idea. You have no idea what he means to me. All he ever needed to do was win in 2008, and win he did. He could have let the Great Depression happen, he might not have passed health care reform or Wall Street reform, and I would still have liked him just fine. The fact that he is destined for greatness makes it easier to like him, but that is not why I like him. (The Tea Party Is Getting America Talibanized)
I wear black. It feels good. It feels right. It feels warm.
Last night I showed up at the party I thought Rachel Sklar had thrown for Fred Wilson's birthday. Ends up it was Rachel Sklar's birthday. Wait, I am confused. Fred Wilson raises money to get more young women into math and science instead of celebrating his birthday. I told you, he is a feminist! And this party was tied into that. So I can't be too off. Maybe the two share birthdays.
So last night I was at my second Digital Dumbo. I even got to say hello to Andrew Zarick, (@a2z) the guy who got me started with Digital Dumbo last month, the organizer. Andrew is from Louisville originally. I have spent a few years in Kentucky. But Louisville is like Kentucky's own New York City. I was in a small town. He might not relate.
The evening was as fabulous as I expected it to be, although the next time I think I am going to pull a Miko Mercer (@mikomercer) and not drink any beer. Only a few days back I learned Ann Curry is half Japanese like Miko. (Ann Curry Commencement)
All beer drinking is obligatory drinking for me. I don't enjoy the process. I enjoy the effect even less. I far more enjoy working the crowd, hopping from one puddle to the next and next.
I paid my compliments, first at my blog in the morning, and then in person to Andrew in the evening. I was 15 minutes late, and still one of the first to show. Digital Dumbo is what the NY Tech MeetUp after party should be, I said.
"I am friends with Nate," he said. If Andrew Zarick is a Louisville guy, Nate Westheimer is a Cincinnati guy. Between them they have all the bases covered. Nate organizes the NY Tech MeetUp. Of course I am familiar with Cincy too. And I am friends with Nate. His is a delightful presence on the local tech scene.
I really like the Dumbo name, and it can't be all technology, although it is the only geographical locale of its kind in the city. The name Dumbo reminds me of Appu, the mascot for the Asian games in Delhi in 1982.
My family and relatives call me Pappu, not Paramendra. Paramendra is the name they came up with when it was time for me to go to school. And a good name too, totally Google friendly. Elephants and mangoes are so India.
One day a high school friend showed up at our house - my grandfather was out on the verandah - and he made the mistake of asking for Paramendra. He was promptly asked to keep walking down the street. My grandfather did not recognize the name off the bat.
I really appreciated the space. The Dumbo Loft is special. I hope they stick to the venue. They might not have anything better in Dumbo. To a few people I said, this space, and this floor, makes me want to practice my kicks, throw around my lower limbs, try out some basic martial arts.
You had to enter your name on a computer when you got there, and the computer would generate a name for you. Mine was DJ something Dog.
The guy serving beer remembered me from last time. Why not? I was the guy who asked for water.
I liked working the room. I would go from one group of two people to another group of three people, until I was tipsy and no longer effective. I left around 9 PM. Most people had formed small groups around people they worked with, people they showed up with. I'd show up and stir the water a bit.
This event had the healthiest male female ratio of any tech event I have ever been to. How did this happen? I think it was pretty much half and half. That sure was not the case at the last Digital Dumbo. And that sure does not happen at the NY Tech MeetUp. I was impressed but also perplexed. I got into a lengthy conversation with this one woman coder. I asked her why she thought most coders were men. She said, beats me, your guess is as good as mine.
You gotta ask, what is Andrew Zarick's secret sauce?
Image via WikipediaTimes Of India: Government nod to prosecute Google, Facebook, Yahoo
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